


Burning

by Thean



Category: Ai no Kusabi
Genre: M/M, ank creative challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-20
Updated: 2020-03-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:40:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23231089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thean/pseuds/Thean
Summary: Riki, back in Ceres for some months, is struggling with the lack left by leaving Eos after 3 years.
Relationships: Iason Mink/Riki
Comments: 6
Kudos: 32
Collections: Ai no Kusabi Creative Challenge 2020





	Burning

**Author's Note:**

> For the #ankcreativechallenge prompt based on the quote:  
> "Such a lack of freedom, in the name of freedom" (Iason, File-0)  
> This isn't the same context, but I thought it would fit the theme anyway.

This horrible need, again. Riki discreetly left his gang at the pub where they were hanging out and went home as quickly as it was possible without showing his discomfort to people who crossed his way. He didn’t want them to question his odd behaviour.

He felt slightly reassured when he finally reach the safety of his flat and of his room, but not for long. Going here was merely a way to don’t have to live this torture in front of the others. For Guy, especially, to don’t ask what happened to him. He guessed that his mate wanted to, sometimes, but fortunately he hasn't done it… yet. He hoped that he would never do.

He leant toward the wall, sweating, panting. At least here, he didn’t have to suffer from any other look or nasty comments. Icy look, icy voice.

As the desire grew stronger, he bit his lips and let himself slide to the floor. He just could do absolutely nothing. Just waiting, hoping that it would pass by itself as soon as possible.

The first time it had happened, he had hoped that he could release himself, but he didn’t have. And then, he had knew that he wouldn’t be able to do it ever again. The cost for his freedom was high and gave him a detestable aftertaste of what had been his jail. Nothing in Eos should have been able to be linked to Ceres, the two places were supposed to be totally opposite and unable to merge, and yet Riki had been the exception created by Iason, and now some of the high tower had followed him back in the slums. Riki felt as a Tanagura’s garbage thrown into Ceres’ trash, among some rests. Eos was so filled with aphrodisiacs that some of it had inevitably joined him and now, lost in a place far from home, they tied to the only element they knew, ignoring that he had been the leader of Bison they shouldn’t have met in the first place.

Riki had tried to understand why he was still so unable to take care of himself, even after several months. Every time he had wanted to, he had seen the two cold blue eyes of his tormentor in his mind and fear had stopped him. It wasn’t really the fear of Iason. He was conscious that the Blondy wasn’t here to forbid him anything now. He would never be anymore. It was the fear of himself. Because he didn’t want to do anything that would bring him back in the tower. As if the simple act of masturbation could make him leave his safe place and teleport him over there once again. And even if he knew it was just a stupid idea and that it wouldn’t happen, he couldn’t stand it.

And at the same time, there was the opposite fear. The little annoying voice that told him that it didn’t matter how he would do it, Iason would have done it better. He was afraid of giving free reins to his desire, but he was even more afraid to don’t succeed in reaching the chains of pleasure, or to the idea of it feeling insipid. Iason had always pushed him to his very limits, night after night, but he would never do it by himself. He wasn’t able to.

Riki pushed himself to stop his thoughts. It was the deeper reason why he was afraid of not succeeding to reach the state he was shamely longing for by himself: he didn’t want to accept the idea that he missed Iason. It was a too shameful thought, even without the fact that the man would never ask him back. Even after all this time and even without their owner to be here, he still felt invisible chains tying him to the past he just wanted to forget.

So, he prefered to let his desire burning him by inside, unable to reach realease, alone with his nightmares.


End file.
